My Head or My Heart?

How did August happen? It’s too soon. I am excited for cooler weather, which should take place in about November. We don’t get much of an Autumn here and I miss it – apple orchards, scarves, mittens, wood stoves. Aahh. We are going to have to visit our daughter in the mountains more, at least until it snows. I want no part of that.

I sat down to read this morning and when I picked up not a fan, it flopped open to a section by Kyle that I read early last week. He says, “When we learn to truly follow Jesus, we find that obedience comes from the inside out.” That really struck me this morning. I am attempting to add a new element to my daily routine and, as I wrote out a daily plan, I just kept thinking about how it would take time and patience with myself to get it to stick. Then, I opened not a fan, and my thoughts turned to “am I obedient in my studies or is it just a part of my routine?”

It’s good to be obedient, but I don’t like the idea of being mindlessly obedient. Is it good to read because it’s what I’m “supposed” to be doing? Of course! More importantly to me, is that kind of obedience drawing me closer to God? There have been so many times in my life where I have craved the Word of God. Being in my scriptures felt just as important as eating or sleeping and those even felt “in the way.” I haven’t felt that way in awhile. I settle in every morning, expecting light and knowledge but I’m afraid I’m only giving my time and not my heart. I’m not sure what to do about this except carry on and spend some time in prayer and serious pondering. 


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