I think that should be my new mantra. “Just for today I can…” Life mixed in with my constant need to stay on a routine can seem pretty overwhelming. I am constantly pushing myself – the better I feel, the more I add to my plate. I think we know what comes next, I have a hard day, it all goes out the window, and I start over with just the basics. I looked at my pile of studies I want to enjoy and realized I’m getting pretty close to needing to pare it down before I do have a bad couple of days that send me to bed. I can actually feel it coming on. I’m so tired today; I can hardly keep my eyes open. It’s not from a lack of sleep though. My brain is struggling.!
During my studies this morning, I jotted down a word from each book that summarized the message – love, commitment, forgiveness, service, faith, NOW! I am a sprinter. I like to try something new, get to a level of proficiency, and then, I quit and move on to the next thing. I looked at that short list and it suddenly hit me that these are things I’ll never be able to cross off of my list. Boom! I did enough service. I can cross that one off. These are skills to practice every day of my life – a marathon. Uh oh. I may need some help here and, good thing, I know where to find it.
My reading in not a fan this morning was all about giving myself to God now. Now, not later. Now is tricky. What if I don’t know how? I know how – practicing all of those small things He’s asked me to do with full purpose of heart, asking for His guidance and help every step of the way, and being patient with myself. While this short list may not have anything crossed off, they can become a part of who I am with His help and that’s good enough for me.